Last Drop Blog

For the first time in maybe my entire life I am happy to say I have goals that I feel are truly attainable for myself. I am moving essentially cross-country from Boston, MA to Austin, TX. I do not know anyone in Austin, I visited once in 2019 and had one of my worst drinking weekends I can remember. I basically just drank and slept and didn’t get a chance to embrace the city all that much so you could say I am going in completely blind. This is definitely outside of my comfort zone. I would consider myself introverted. I relied on alcohol to socialize and make friends the majority of my adult life. So to throw myself in a new city far away from home without knowing anyone is going to challenge me. I will essentially be forced to socialize and put myself out there because the alternative is basically loneliness. My goal and intent for this move is to meet new people, get out of my comfort zone, find out more about myself, grow as a person and discover what interests me. I grew up in Massachusetts my entire life, went to college in Virginia, and moved back to MA after graduating. I met most of my friends in college through my fraternity and if you do not know already fraternities main bond is around drinking (at least the one I joined was). I truly made some life-long friends in college but I also picked up or increased some of my bad habits. When I moved back home I already had hometown friends and we continued to bond/socialize over drinking. Granted, I can spend time with my friends (both from school and home) sober now and enjoy myself it just isn’t the top option and I understand that. Sober socialization for a majority of 24 year olds is probably not the top option. I totally get it, if you asked me what I wanted to do next weekend just one year ago I would have said watch the game at the bar or get shit-faced and go to a party. That still is the case for most of my peers and that is not something I can or ever will be able to control. This is a valuable lesson I have learned or just became more aware of during my sobriety journey, you can only control you. So what I am working to control now is myself and my environment. Sure, I know Austin is probably viewed as a party/drinking city but so is Boston and maybe every city if thats your perception. But I don’t drink anymore so I cant really perceive a city or place that way. End of the day its a totally new environment and I am willing to be open-minded to it. I also will work to be open-minded in exploring sober communities. This is a goal of mine as well. I want to explore sober events and groups in hopes of finding sober friends. Just about everyone that I listen to or hear from that is sober recommends having a support group on the same or similar mission. The fact of the matter is my interests right now are much different than my interests a year ago. Because my interests changed I was missing out on the common bond that brought my old group of friends together and that was drinking. I still appreciate most of my friends that I have made throughout my life and will likely still be friends with them. It is just a fact however, that I am on a sober journey and those old friends are not. They still enjoy drinking and bars and I do not hold that against them. I deemed it’s time for me to pack up and experience these life changes in an entirely new city. I don’t like the idea of “fresh start” or “clean slate” because I feel like that insinuates you are ashamed of your past which I am not. I am committing to my gut feelings and trying something new. So long story short, I am pushing myself this coming year and working to experience growth in a new city. If I don’t do it now then when will I? No better time than now to pack up and see what else may be out there for me. I am excited, uneasy, nervous and happy about this change. I trust that regardless of what happens this coming year I will be better off because of it. I trust that I will soon have a better idea of who I am and what I want to accomplish. I trust that continuing to work towards a sober life is the best thing for me.

I hope to continue to blog next year and share my journey with whoever chooses to read. I hope I can help one person who is struggling with alcohol or just having a hard time in general. Nothing worth doing is easy.